It is the eve of the Royal Wedding and I can safely say I take very little interest in it all, no doubt I will have a brief look at the pictures of Kate Middleton's dress just to see what it's like (I doubt I will be able to avoid it anyway) but generally it doesn't matter much to me. I'm not really a wedding person and I never have been, as a young girl you are supposed to dream of your wedding day and honestly I can say I never really have, perhaps I have thought about the dress but only in passing.
I think the idea of a wedding and the idea of a marriage get somewhat confused, I have not planned how I would like my future wedding to be, I never pictured my married life with the two point four kids and the white picket fence. To me 'wedding' and 'marriage' are really two mutually exclusive terms, the Royal Wedding is a huge televised event that anyone can witness, but it is only one day, after all the hype dies down there is just Wills and Kate behind closed doors trying to figure out how to get along as a married couple like any other newlyweds (albeit with a lot more money and a lifetime in the public eye).
For me a wedding day would be a terrifying event, I don't like being the centre of attention so the idea of a day that is supposed to be all about you scares me, even if it were a small gathering of people I think I would still feel a certain amount of 'stage fright'. The idea of a marriage makes more sense to me, I have nothing against people who want a huge wedding, all power to you but people who get married just for the wedding day, well that doesn't seem right. It's supposed to be about sharing your life with someone not a lavish dress and thousands of guests. I guess it's all about taste and personality with this one, you plan the wedding that best suits you.
I have never been strongly for or against marriage as many people are, I find this strong desire to get married, or a strong desire not to get married can be a complex issue. If you are in a loving, stable relationship why does it matter whether you get married or not? In this day and age people live together for years, have children, share bank accounts all without being married. Is it that the institution offers a kind of stability that can never be fully realised without a marriage certificate? I know there are a number of legal benefits to getting married, is it the security of these that matter or is it something more inherent that makes us choose this path?
|All images by Mario Testino for the current issue of British Vogue|
So these are just a few musings I have on the subject, I am not at all well versed on the subject of either weddings or marriage, I would love to know your thoughts. I know many of the people whose blogs I read are married, had you always dreamed of being married? What was your wedding like?